Released on Monday, December 14 2009

By Nick Levine, Music Editor
Those elements of the media who enjoy extinguishing a popstar's bonfire with their own urine are taking delight in reporting that Robbie's bid for a comeback No.1 has yet again been thwarted by an X Factor act. However, let's take this opportunity to get things into perspective. 'Bodies' is his biggest crowd-pleaser since 'Feel', his Reality album's just shifted 240,000 copies in a week, and there's even an air of warm 'n' fuzziness between him and Gazza Barlow right now. From where we're sitting, Robbie's not doing half bad.

Now comes 'You Know Me', a single whose very title seems to be cosying up to all those fans he's neglected in recent years - just the sort of fans who are likely to enjoy this tune. Borrowing sufficiently from Francoise Hardy's 'Voila' to earn the chanteuse a co-writing credit, it's a classic Robbie ballad with lashings of strings, "shoo-ba-ba" backing vocals and a lovely, timeless-sounding chorus melody. There's even an acknowledgement that the boy's realised the error of his ways: "I've been doing what I like when I like how I like – it's joyless." The UFOs' loss is our gain.
http://www.digitalspy.co.uk/music....me.html

By Thomas H Green
Published: 5:26PM GMT 02 Dec 2009

POP on MUZU.
Link to this video

Once again Simon Cowell’s talent show behemoth is set to dominate British pop at Christmas. An X Factor No.1 is such a foregone conclusion that not only is William Hill, the bookies, taking bets on the Christmas No.2 but they’ve started doing brisk trade on the No.1 album (Susan Boyle and Leona Lewis, Cowell acolytes both, are the favourites). As ever, the predominance of downloads, even during the only time of year when physical singles do good business, means old tracks can pop randomly into the Top 20 as The Pogues did last year and Michael Jackson, Journey and Miley Cyrus may this.

Nevertheless, Cowell’s monopoly has rendered even household names such as George Michael and Robbie Williams rank outsiders. Anyone who can hold him off the top spot — even Rolf Harris - will be feted by maverick music-lovers across the nation.

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* X factor winner

SONG Rumour has it, either Miley Cyrus’s 'The Climb’ or Journey’s 'Don’t Stop Believing’.

THE LOWDOWN The X-Factor winner’s song is now a shoe-in for the top of the charts, but has Cowell taken all the fun out of pop’s annual silly season?

IS IT FESTIVE? No, but the festive spirit of goodwill may mysteriously whet appetites for American AOR stodge or a power ballad from 'Hannah Montana: The Movie’.

ODDS ON MAKING NO.1 Almost definite. X Factor recently hit a 16 million viewer peak. If a fraction of them buy it, all opposition will be decimated. 1/8

* Susan Boyle

SONG Wild Horses

THE LOWDOWN The Britain’s Got Talent runner-up has had a tough time with fame but it took only a week for her debut album to outsell the latest from both U2 and Eminem.

IS IT FESTIVE? No, it’s The Rolling Stones magnificent broken-down honkytonk ballad transformed into musical theatre easy listening.

ODDS ON MAKING NO.1 The fastest-selling UK debut album ever (410,000 and counting) and another Cowell protégé, so she’s in with a chance. 8/1

* Robbie Williams

SONG You Know Me

THE LOWDOWN Will he rejoin Take That? Or marry Ayda Field? A two year beard-growing sabbatical hasn’t blunted Williams’ ability to generate column inches for his latest single.

IS IT FESTIVE? Not really, it’s another power ballad, but Williams spikes all bombast with a video wherein he transforms into a tweed-wearing rabbit and is serenaded by cabbages.

ODDS ON MAKING NO.1 It would be foolish to mistake the curious, sniping media backlash for a genuine plummet in Williams’ popular appeal. 25/1

* George Michael

SONG December Song (I Dreamed Of Christmas)

THE LOWDOWN The man who gave the world 'Last Christmas’ returns with a wistful, if lyrically daft, ballad of Yuletide longing.

IS IT FESTIVE? Yes, very, and it arrives with a sweet cyber-Dickensian animated video which affectingly boosts its parlour song sentimentalism.

ODDS ON MAKING NO.1 Why not? George Michael, often in the public eye for all the wrong reasons, makes a decent stab at old school Christmas crooning. 50/1

* Rolf Harris & Rick Parfitt

SONG Christmas In The Sun

THE LOWDOWN A Status Quo-alike chug-along with the 79 year old Harris reminiscing about December barbecues back in Oz.

IS IT FESTIVE? Naffly so. “What are you going to get me for Christmas, lads?” asks Rolf to which Parfitt responds with the chorus from the Quo’s 'Whatever You Want’

ODDS ON MAKING NO.1 “Forget rock 'n’ roll,” said Quo veteran Parfitt recently, “this is Rick'n’Rolf.” Maybe, but Brits will never embrace the concept of a summery Christmas. 60/1

* Pet Shop Boys

SONG It Doesn’t Often Snow At Christmas

THE LOWDOWN Pet Shop Boys dig out an old fan-only release to boost their new single, just in time for their UK arena tour.

IS IT FESTIVE? Yes, albeit somewhat acerbically — “Christmas is not all it’s cracked up to be/Families fighting around the plastic tree.”

ODDS ON MAKING NO.1 The perennially entertaining pop duo probably have a Christmas classic in them yet, but this isn’t it. 60/1

* Taken By Trees

SONG Sweet Child O’ Mine

THE LOWDOWN The Guns N’Roses rocker is transformed into a kooky piano-led ballad by Victoria Bergsman, ex-singer with Norwegian indie band The Concretes.

IS IT FESTIVE? Only by association — it soundtracks a sugary TV ad for John Lewis featuring lots of cutesy kids eagerly opening presents.

ODDS ON MAKING NO.1 Gary Jules’ similarly Spartan deconstruction of Tears For Fears’ 'Mad World’ made the Christmas top spot in 2003 so it’s possible. 60/1

* Bob Dylan

SONG Must Be Santa

THE LOWDOWN Mittel-European folk tune transformed into a demented accordion-led polka by an uncharacteristically manic Dylan for his Christmas charity album.

IS IT FESTIVE? Very. The video is extraordinary. Dylan, sporting a blonde wig and Santa hat, goes loopy at a hoedown house party, all while never changing his expression.

ODDS ON MAKING NO.1 There’s something admirable about its sheer lunacy so a No.1 would be brilliant, but it’s highly unlikely. 100/1

* Geoffrey Palmer & Alison Steadman

SONG Words For You

THE LOWDOWN Palmer reads Ecclesiastes over Vivaldi while Steadman tackles Elizabeth Jennings’ 'Friendship’ to Beethoven. From a charity album with actors reading British poems to classical backdrops.

IS IT FESTIVE? Only insofar as it’s rather like teetering into a doze on the sofa, fireside and full, on a seasonal visit to an elderly relative.

ODDS ON MAKING NO.1 The parent album is doing well but this double-header really is too soporific to make the charts. 150/1

* The Hush Now

SONG Wishing You A Happy Christmas

THE LOWDOWN Indie band from Portland, Oregon, lay down their own unlikely bid for Christmas immortality.

IS IT FESTIVE? Yes, deliciously so. They filter the influence of Phil Spector, Bing Crosby, etc, through a charming haze of psychedelic guitar pop.

ODDS ON MAKING NO.1 Absolutely no chance but it is, nonetheless, the loveliest recording here. 1000/1
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture....ne.html

Perfectly bearable, pleasant even, only if you're a fan already that is. Hate to predictably piss on his bonfire but this doesn't stand a chance against them X-Factor folks. Poor but likeable, if you're that way inclined. 2.5/5
http://www.spoonfed.co.uk/spooner....ec-1802

Yes. Of course Robbie 'megastar' Williams is in a different league. Sure, he's been experimental at times (that tracksuit in 'Rudebox'), and been guilty of 'making his type of music', ignoring his fans. BUT as second-single-into-a-big-comeback releases go, this is actually as perfect a choice as he could have made.

(Here's the video. Watch out for the Doo-Wop frogs.)

Classic Robbie is back at exactly the time his followers would want him to be. At some point during his break he must have had an epiphany... 'If I make music similar to my old popular stuff, my fans will probably buy it'... and it only took him 2 years to figure it out!

The track doesn't break new grounds. The melody is simple and the structure predictable, even down to the final chorus when the backing stops, giving the audience the chance to clap along, but it's got that love-rules-all, feel good factor which makes all the women fall for him, and a decent percentage of the men too. He puts on his crooner voice, mixes it with some lovey-dovey lyrics, adds a string orchestra, a friendly 50's doo-wop backing and Bob's your uncle; he's got himself a winner*.

It's also one of those tracks that give him ample opportunities to make that weird nodding grimace grin thing he puts on while on stage. You know: the one where he looks like he's about to cry... like he's saying 'This is life's perfect moment and I'm sharing it with you.' The crowd love a bit of that cheese.

Nice work Rob, now please don't fail me with the third release.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/blogs....e.shtml

Digital Download
You Know Me
You Know Me (The Count and Sinden Remix)
You Know Me (The Count & Sinden Dub-ble Bubble Remix)

After four years of success for the winning contestant on X Factor, the Christmas No.1 is no longer seen as purely the domain of the TV singing contest.

Largely responsible is an anti-establishment campaign on the internet.

A Facebook group is urging people to buy Rage Against The Machine's 1992 hit Killing In The Name to challenge 18-year-old Joe McElderry, who recently won X Factor and released his single, The Climb.

A week before Christmas, the group had more than 750,000 members supporting the Rage Against The Machine track, chosen for its message of taking a stand against authority.

The campaign isn't a personal attack on McElderry.

About 20 million viewers tuned in to watch the sweet-natured, 18-year-old boy next door with a stunning voice win the X Factor final by public vote.

Rage Against The Machine guitarist Tom Morello, who has welcomed the campaign for the 1992 song, said it was aimed at countering the idea of the public being 'spoonfed' what to buy.

'Your country has such a great, rich history of cutting-edge, exciting rebel music - whether it be the early Stones or Who, or the Clash and the Sex Pistols or Prodigy and Muse,' the American told BBC 6 Music.

'I think people are just fed-up of being spoonfed some overblown sugary ballad that sits on top of the charts. It's a little dose of anarchy for the holidays, it's good for the soul.'

Morello said the campaign wasn't even against X Factor's executive producer, Simon Cowell, who has branded it 'stupid'.

Regardless of the target, the importance the British public has come to place on the Christmas No.1 seller is clear.

Artists haven't always targeted the top yuletide billing.

Only some of the songs have had Christmas themes, like Slade's Merry Christmas Everybody (1973), Mistletoe and Wine by Cliff Richard (1988) and Band Aid's 1984 charity single, Do They Know It's Christmas.

Many have been massive hits that happened to coincide with the festive season, including Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody in 1975 and again following frontman Freddie Mercury's death in November 1991.

Stay Another Day by East 17 (1994) is another example, although the ringing bells gave it a Christmas feel.

Others, meanwhile, have set out to snare the big Christmas sales - none more so than the X Factor juggernaut.

Harris has joined Rick Parfitt, of veteran British rock group Status Quo, to record Christmas In The Sun for a tilt at topping the charts.

Should he succeed, the 79-year-old Australian would recapture the glory of his 1969 Christmas No.1, Two Little Boys.

He is only rated an outside chance, however, with the contest regarded a two-horse race between McElderry and Rage.

Even George Michael's latest offering, December Song (I Dreamed Of Christmas), and Robbie Williams' power ballad, You Know Me, are considered long shots.

And Scottish spinster-turned-megastar Susan Boyle, another Cowell protege as Britain's Got Talent runner-up, is unlikely to have the No.1 single despite recently releasing the fastest-selling UK debut album in history.

Unless X Factor judge Dannii Minogue cranks out a single in the coming days to make a late charge, Australia's last appearance looks set to remain 2001 with Nicole Kidman and Robbie Williams' Something Stupid.

Some might argue the song's title sums up the hype around the Christmas No.1.
http://bigpondnews.com/article....03.html